Breaking the Ocean - by Annahid Dashtgard (Paperback)
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<p/><br></br><p><b> About the Book </b></p></br></br>"A deeply intimate and provocative memoir of the explorations of a young immigrant mixed-race woman trying to find her way to belonging through social change. A profound and important read at this time of the intersections of our struggles. We need more voices like hers."--Judy Rebick, author of <i>Heroes in my Head<i>ad<i><p/><br></br><p><b> Book Synopsis </b></p></br></br><p>It is the beginning of September, the first day of school, and the sun is flirting with making an appearance. Butterflies fill my stomach, but in a good way. Today marks my four-year-old daughter's first day of attending the "big school" at the end of our street. She's wearing the robin's-egg-blue dress I bought for her birthday earlier this year with the silver filigree design down the front -- an echo of her Middle Eastern roots. My husband Shakil and I leave the house to drop her off together. With her marching gait, laser-beam gaze, and set mouth, she seems fine. Better off than her mama.</p><p>I feel alone. The paralyzing isolation I felt during the early years of motherhood has given way to tenuous new connections with many other parents -- through daycare, local Facebook groups, and community gatherings -- but I'm still off balance. Despite reaching middle age, despite having achieved professional success, despite all the wonderful things and people in my life, this moment undoes me.</p><p>The sight of monkey bars and green playing field makes me feel tight and floaty at the same time. I know it's because a part of me was left behind in a place just like this, where I learned that in order to survive I had to make myself disappear. I can't catch my breath. I feel dislocated.</p><p>My daughter runs into the play area without a backward glance, and I call her back to give her one last hug. "Enjoy your first day at your new school, Baba. I love you so much," I whisper. I can't tell if it's her or some earlier version of myself that I watch twist and spin away, the past collapsing into the present. All I know is that my daughter's story begins with my story. And my story begins with my people.</p>
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